Saturday, July 5, 2008

Another step on the journey

I am very pleased to note that the D/s aspect of my and my life partner's relationship is becoming more pronounced. I had been getting frustrated because my girl seemed to be acting a bit of a brat, and it pissed me off more than it turned me on. I thought that once our lifestyle and roles were identified, things would fall into place. But after some thought I realized that particularly in her case, she didn't know what to do. It was up to me to instruct her, which seems only right as I am the Dominant one in this relationship.

So I started changing a few things. For starters, when decisions needed to be made, I stopped saying, "I don't care, whatever you think, why don't you make a decision for once?" I started making the decisions. And they were accepted, because subconsciously (or maybe not so subconsciously) my girl was looking for guidance.

Secondly, I started openly vocalizing things that should and should not be done/said/etc in the relationship. For example, once she tried to command me to do something - basically being a brat - and I gave her an "Are you kidding me?" look and flat-out told her that she was not the one in the position to be giving orders. She actually ducked her head and apologized!

I suppose that if any old-hand Dom/mes are reading this they're probably chuckling and thinking that this sort of thing is old news to them, but with my being a neophyte to the lifestyle, with letting my Dominant side become truly active without anyone fighting against it, this is all so new and glorious to me!

I am well and truly enjoying it, as I am well and truly enjoying my girl settling into her position under me.

Now if only I could find a nice man under whom I can settle for a time...