Thursday, October 30, 2008

HNT - getting naughtier!

Happy happy HNT everyone!

My contribution du semaine:

Indeed, that would be my lower abdomen/hips, clad only in brand spankin' new mesh-and-lace undies, with a hint of tattoo peeking through.

I'm really diggin' the hint of curve along the line of my hip. I look like I'm sticking my butt out... but I'm not at all!

And may I just say, I felt SEXEH in those undies. Glad I picked up three pairs - this one, a bright blue pair and, of course, a pretty black pair.

Have a good one!


Monday, October 27, 2008


The bubble of my immediate world seems to be getting more and more genderqueer. Taking M shopping for dress pants, shirts and ties. Scouting around for suspenders. I'm told that next up is a blazer-type jacket. I'm sure binding bras would be somewhere on that list if she didn't absolutely hate bra shopping so much.

I'm excited beyond words about the upcoming party this weekend. My first play party, around Halloween, and all the local people whom I've met so far and want to play with are going to be there. Whether or not I get to play with them all, I think this party is going to go very well. Now I just need to come up with a dish, since it's a potluck party.

I feel oddly disconnected from the kink/sex blogging scene on M's computer. I think it's probably because I don't have my rather extensive list of favorites and my feed reader. Luckily my computer is being worked on right now, so hopefully soon...!

I've been experiencing some frustration lately because I don't feel like this blog is going anywhere. I don't feel like I have a very large audience. But then I think to myself, why do I NEED one? Yeah, I'd love to become a fairly well known sex/kink blogger someday, but (1) Rome wasn't built in a day and (2) a blog, I feel, should be first and foremost for the writer and not for the audience. I need to remember to write to express and organize my own thoughts, not to get a few hits and comments. This blog is primarily for my own review and progress, and should anyone else take enlightenment from its contents, then that's a bonus. A bonus, but NOT the main point.

Of course, I say this and realize that I could very well be alienating what readers I do have. No, I am not waving the finger to my small little circle of readers! If I really intended to share these thoughts only with myself, I'd lock this journal down or write it on paper. Knowledge is power or so it's said, and I'm all about sharing the power of knowledge - particularly on such subjects as are considered "taboo" by the unenlightened.

Last night I was lying on my bed listening to Ellie Lumpesse's interview on her show Bedroom Radio with Sinclair Sexsmith of Sugarbutch fame. I don't know what exactly compelled me to listen to it again, but it is a really good interview. (I urge you to partake if you haven't yet.) Even better when you really take the time to listen to only it and not be distracted by anything else that's going on. The concepts discussed are really thought-provoking. The sex story that Sinclair reads at the end, too, is jaw dropping. The first time I read it I got horny. The second time I read it I could feel my heart fluttering in my chest. I could feel my cunt contracting. I could hear my own breathing inside my head as loud as the roar of the ocean. Somewhere in the back of my head, underneath the semi-orgasmic haze, I was inspired to write my own sex stories. One day.

Well, before I make this post too long, I'm off to track down more smut on the Sugarbutch Chronicles. That Mr. Sexsmith can turn quite the tale.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

It's circulating!

I've been tagged! (I can't pretend I'm not pleased, though.) I don't know that I'll do 14 like Scarlet did, but we'll see what I come up with!

The Rules:
-Link to your tagger and list these rules on your blog.
-Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog - some random, some weird.
-Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blog.
-Let them know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

1. I am a total dog nut. Hardcore. I love any and all things canine. Well, okay, that isn't true. I dislike certain breeds like chihuahuas, min pins, schnauzers (unless they're giant schnauzers), spaniels, miniature/toy poodles, and miniature dachshunds. In fact, I pretty much hate that people feel the need to (a) miniaturize everything, and (b) intentionally breed mutts, call them stupid -doodle or -poo names and then sell them like they're some rare find or something.

2. I'm a bellydancer. I do mostly dark fusion stuff, but my movement vocabulary is based in raqs sharqi. My bellydance idols are Kami Liddle, Amy Sigil and the rest of UNMATA, the Indigo, Tempest and a plethora of truly talented, inspirational local dancers.

3. I'm constantly obsessed with changing my hair. Changing color, style, length... I'm pretty much never fully satisfied. For instance, right now I love the color (dark, rich brown), but I rather want to chop it all off. It's almost mid-back right now, but I've been increasingly thinking about chopping it all off to a pixie length. And playing with curls. Ad infinitum.

4. I loooooooooooove body mods. I have 9 piercings - three in each lobe/lower helix, the first holes stretched to 10g and going further, an industrial and a nostril piercing - a host of retired piercings including tongue, navel and random ear piercings - and 4 tattoos. To me this is far too few and I will be getting many more of both as finances permit. My next piercing will be either a VCH or sternal microdermals, and my next tattoo will be a watercolor-esque tiger lily piece on my upper left arm. I also love the ideas of scarification, branding and suspension, although the only two I would probably try would be the scarification and suspension. MAYBE. We'll see if the opportunity ever arises.

5. Within reason, I will try anything once. I figure, if I'm going to dislike something, I'd better have a firsthand reason behind that dislike and not rely on the judgement of other people. And who knows, something I thought I'd dislike, I might actually turn out to like! For instance, sushi grew on me. In a big way. Anal sex, however, did not. I can give, but not receive.

6. This election is the first in which I've truly participated. In fact, I just registered not a month ago - Independent. I was too young to vote in either of the Dubya elections, although I knew I didn't like the man. After that I just didn't care enough to really do more than form a loose opinion of the candidates involved in whatever election it was. This one I'm totally in. And I don't think I have to say who I'm voting for!

7. My most hated chore is folding/putting away laundry, but I force myself to do it because I also can't stand digging through a laundry basket full of clean laundry and having it come out all wrinkled. Although, speaking of wrinkles, I don't own an iron. Anything that needs de-wrinkled either goes in a steamy bathroom or in the dryer!

8. Nothing - at least, nothing I've experienced thus far - gives me quite as much of a thrill as flogging/paddling/whipping/caning/otherwise beating the crap out of a willing bottom. I LOVE leaving marks. Of any kind. Mmmmm.

Okay, I'm stopping at 8. Hmm, who to tag...

And, to expand it beyond the sex blogger circle... Dimmie!

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

The Hottie

Soooo, the Hottie! This would be the prize picked out by M and I after winning Shay's S Spot contest, generously hosted by EdenFantasys. Our only limitation was that the prize had to be less than $60, and this bad boy fit the bill. Of course, that's not the only reason we chose it. We chose the Hottie because I wanted something that vibrated (I was absolutely certain I would not get off on being fucked by a regular ol' cock-shaped lump of plastic - more on THAT later) and because I wanted something a little more realistically shaped than the rather cheap vibrator I'd subsisted on for some time. M, having no experience picking out sex toys of her own, just went along and contributed things she thought she wouldn't like. The Hottie contained none of these things.

A little about the Hottie! It is phthalate-free silicone, hypoallergenic and latex-free, rating a 10 out of 10 on EdenFantasy's material safety chart. It is also harness compatible, although unfortunately I don't have a harness so I couldn't test that theory. It comes with a removable bullet vibe which fits snugly into a hollow in the base of the cock.

So, I relayed our choice to Shay who then passed it on to EdenFantasys and in about a week, just as promised, a little box arrived at the end of our breezeway. I'm pretty sure I actually squeed out loud from sheer delight.

Upon unveiling the Hottie, I was rather pleasantly surprised. He was not as long as he appears in the photo, but thickness was a pleasing hefty average - maybe not enough for you hardcore girth lovers but certainly enough for my tastes - and the color... ohhh my, let me just say, the Hottie is beautiful. In the picture the Hottie looks like a vaguely pearlescent blue, but in reality, he is swirled with various subtle shades of shimmery blue. The head is separated from the shaft by a nice ridge, and there's even a hint of a vein running down the underside of the shaft.

I automatically fitted the bullet into the hollow base - nice and easy there, no troubles - and pushed the button that controls the speed. The vibe IS only one speed, but it's a nice moderate speed, easily felt all throughout the cock. And, major plus, this thing is battery-equipped! No junk drawer hunting necessary! I touched the head of the cock to my clit through my pants, and a pleasant shiver went down my spine. The vibe strength of the Hottie will be nothing for the Hitachi-faithful out there, but for those who prefer a less extreme vibe, this is awesome. It's not weak by any stretch of the imagination. Really quite perfect.

M and I gave it a test run that night. She lubed me up - water based on a silicone cock, remember! - and began gently easing the Hottie into my cunt. To my surprise, it was actually a little uncomfortable at first! I didn't think I'd have any issues taking this silicock because I am no virgin and my last man was quite well equipped - as big as if not bigger than the hottie - but apparently I had downsized a bit since my last foray into hetero sex. Once the Hottie was well seated, however... ohhhh yesssss. Like I said before, for you major size lovers the Hottie may disappoint, but for those of you who like slightly-above-average length and girth, the Hottie is heavenly! The middle of the shaft and the head are nice and firm, as well. Really quite like an erect, flesh-and-blood cock: mostly rigid, but still somewhat pliable. There is a slight upward curve to the cock that allows the head to nestle right against the G-spot, which was absolutely scream-worthy once the thrusting began.

And actually, to backtrack a little, I should say that the Hottie also produced a very nice clit orgasm as well. It took a little longer I think because the broader head of the Hottie was not able to focus as intently on my clit as, say, my more slender, tapered "cheap" vibe, but the orgasm was just as intense and enjoyable. And at least for me, the broader head could be considered a plus because the Hottie was not able to be TOO intense on my extremely sensitive clit.

Ah, but yes, the downsides. There are a few. For one, the bullet vibe is harder than hell to get out of the damn thing. M managed it herself, but the next night after I fucked her, I actually had to get her to help me take the vibe out because it nestles so tightly into its little nook. Also, because the base is hollow, it was a little hard to get a nice tight grip on the cock for hard, fast thrusting - it kept collapsing in my hand and making me lose that strong grip I needed. However, the flared base does help compensate for that. I also should mention that the Hottie isn't silent. I don't require a silent toy, but for those of you who do, the Hottie isn't it. It IS really pretty quiet, though. Able to be heard through covers, maybe, but not through a closed door. Soft music would easily muffle any sound you didn't wish to be heard.

Oh, and that whole "can't get of without a vibration" thing? Ha, I was called on my bullshit big time! At one point M turned off the vibe and just fucked me with the "plain ol' lump of plastic." It was just as good as being fucked with the vibrating cock. Just as good. I am totally sold on quality dildos now. They sure as hell don't all need to vibrate, which is great because it opens me up to a whole new world of choices!

To put it frankly, I was fucked senseless with this thing. It was absolutely unreal. I remember saying to M afterward, "If I can't have real cock, this is the next best thing." And I still believe that. I really don't think you would be able to attain better quality for the very reasonable price.

So, a summary!

The pros:
Phthalate- and latex-free, hypoallergenic, sterilizable
Harness compatible
A nice blend of "pretty" and "realistic"
Battery included for the vibe
Overall size slightly above average, a great "middle of the road" cock
Not too soft or hard throughout most of the shaft
Nice moderately strong vibe

The cons:
Hollow base makes it dificult to get a strong grip for hard, fast fucking
Difficult to remove the bullet vibe for cleaning
Not a completely silent toy

Overall, easily 4 out of 5 stars. The Hottie is HOT.

Present and accounted for

No, no, I swear this blog is NOT dead!

What is dead, however, is my computer, so I've been surviving on the bare Internet essentials using M's computer, which of course makes a snail look like Mach 5. It's ridiculous.

I am still vastly enjoying the Hottie although regrettably I have not gotten - or perhaps taken is the better word - the chance to have some "me time" with it. ;-) A review is forthcoming, however. I've been thinking more and more about it. In fact, I may work on it after I write this catch-up post.

Our first play party is November 1st! I'm insanely excited and already making a list of things I don't want to forget to bring. Its imminence has also brought into sharp relief how few pairs of sexy underwear I own, and in general sexy clothing. I have a black corset which I fully intend on wearing, but... that's about it. No skirts (that fit me anymore, ha), and only a couple pairs of pants I feel truly SEXY in. Time to go shopping! As if I need an excuse.

I've been thinking about just bringing the majority of my blog over here, since so much of my life seems to be characterized by sexuality, gender, kink, and all of the wonderful things that are addressed in this blog. I hardly post on my 'nilla blog anyway, except for silly memes and whatnot. We'll see. One thing's for certain, you'll probably be seeing more day-to-day type stuff on here. I love writing the big epiphany posts and recounting sexual adventures, but that's not all there is to life - not even all there is to a kinky life. I want to share the whole experience. Sorry if that bores you. ;-)

I need to get to thinking about a Halloween-themed HNT. Too bad I don't still have my cute cobweb-patterned witch's hat. Heheheh.

Sunday, October 5, 2008

Slinking back in

Wow, I've been pretty AWOL, haven't I? Terribly sorry. Feel free to spank me. ;-)

No, in all honesty, not much has been happening that would prompt me to post up until a couple days ago. A couple days ago, M's prize from Shay's S Spot contest, the Hottie from Eden Fantasys arrived.

Oohhhh my! I haven't masturbated with the toy yet so I'm holding off on an official, thorough review, but being fucked with it gets at least four out of five stars. I absolutely adore it.

And yes, being fucked with it. Thaaaat was a very good night. Not only did I get fucked with a toy that is probably one of the best alternatives to real cock (for those who go for real cock), but M got a little toppy. And I. Loved. It.

It's interesting for me to think back on when I said I didn't think M topping me would work since our relationship wasn't very switchy and she didn't think she was very switchy. Both of those statements have proved to be very, very false! M can most definitely be switchy as evidenced by how toppy she got with me the night we played with the Hottie: pinning me down, verbally topping, even a bit of forced orgasm play. I was absolutely digging it, so apparently I can be topped by her!

Also interestingly, this switching up seems to have relieved a bit of tension in our relationship, and I think I understand why. Before, our relationship was pretty strictly Dom/sub. I was the Dominant, she was the submissive, and things got shaken up whenever she didn't act submissive. Sometimes she could be put back into subspace; sometimes she couldn't, and that led to pretty nasty arguments when it happened. But now things seem to click more easily in our relationship. Outside the bedroom we almost have a fairly vanilla seeming relationship, with equal levels of power exchange. Of course, both of us know that's entirely not true. :-D

I certainly don't get pissed off anymore if she acts a little toppy, which had definitely smoothed out our dynamic.

Oh, and I have also discovered something else about myself - in particular, my bottomy side - that doesn't come as a surprise at all: I am one very smart-ass bottom. I don't say smart-ass masochist (SAM) because I'm not a very hardcore masochist; I don't say smart-ass sub because to me that implies some level of permanence in the position. But I am most definitely a smartass bottom. I am the perfect bottom for a Top who enjoys challenge and enjoys cooking up creative ways to shut up a bottom who won't stop making snarky, sarcastic remarks and taunting the Top. I am the perfect bottom for a Top who enjoys struggle - a bit of a fight.

Luckily for me in my relationship with M, she is that kind of Top. It sure keeps things fun in the bedroom - even outside the bedroom to a certain extent, since we're both pretty snarky and smartass.

This lightening of the mood overall is really quite enjoyable. The episodes of serious power struggle are pretty much over. We joke about it more often now, and play around with power struggle/exchange.

Anyhoo, stay tuned because if I don't get too busy, a very nice HNT should be coming up this week, and probably following next weekend a full review of the Hottie should be out!